I have warned Mrs Masher many, many times about playing Candy Crush in the bath.

And so, when I couldn’t get hold of her on her phone the other day, it was with some sheepishness that she later told me she had dropped it in the bath.

It was very difficult for me to hold back from saying “I told you so”.

So, I didn’t hold back.

To make things worse, it wasn’t even her two year-old phone that she had dropped: it was the brand new one that I bought her for Christmas.

Less than a month old and it’s knackered!

A few days in the airing cupboard got it to the point where it would (sometimes) switch on again, but it won’t go past the boot-up screen – which is pretty much unreadable on the display.

No combination of soft/hard/factory resets has any beneficial effects.

Just like Monty Python’s parrot, it’s dead.

Bereft of life, it rests in peace.

It has ceased to be.

It’s Mrs M’s birthday next month, so a new phone may be on the cards.

A bloody waterproof one.


  1. Alan

    I am sure you could make a gadget that will sound a loud alarm when a mobile phone enters the bathroom. Mind you the first time it goes off there could be quite a mess on the floor. Otherwise you could remove the bath and just have a shower.
    Now if it was one of the kids they would be told “Hard luck, no phone now.”

    • Masher

      Yeah, but it’s not one of the kids, is it?

  2. Rajesh

    I will always remember the sales guy who mentioned insurance a couple of times as a sales pitch. Next time go for a water proof one, I have seen adverts from Samsung featuring swimming pools.

    • Masher

      That’s no good: we haven’t got a swimming pool.
      Have you seen any adverts featuring a bath?

  3. Toffeeapple

    How on earth can you afford the water for a bath?!

    • Masher

      It’s difficult to work out exactly, TA, but I think the cost of the water and the gas used to heat it comes to about 40p.

      • Alan

        Don’t drop the smart meter in bath 🤽‍♀️ when checking the cost Mr M.

  4. Brennig

    I have no words. I expect you had lots of words. Did you protect your bubble?

    • Masher

      Not too many words, actually, Bren. Wasn’t needed.

      Nah, I didn’t do the insurance thing – I’ve never broken or lost a (personal) phone. I expect others to do the same.

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