Category: At home (page 1 of 2)

Cloth Ears

I arrived home from work yesterday evening and Harry said “You had a phone call earlier, from the local mental centre.

“The where?”

The local mental centre

Having very recently done a course on mental health, my mind immediately turned to that. But, I didn’t remember giving them my home phone number. “You sure it was for me”? I asked.

Yeah. They asked for you by name.”

This had me a bit flummoxed. Also, I didn’t know the town even had a ‘local mental centre’… although I’m sure it must have, somewhere.

Intrigued, I pulled up the Recent Callers list on the phone and googled the number.

And I now have an appointment booked.

At the Luton Dental Centre.

Solo

Mrs Masher has taken the kids off to the South of France for a holiday.

I’m home alone.

As a consequence, I now have an aching wrist and blisters on my palm.

Y’see, we have this bush in the back garden. It’s horrible. And each year it gets bigger.
I’ve never liked it and have threatened to remove it on several occasions.
Mrs M, however, is quite attached to it.  “Don’t you dare touch my bush!” she says, each time I talk of maybe pruning it back a bit.

But, she is away on holiday and when she returns, she’ll find that her bush is gone. I’ll not mention it till then.
Meantime, I’ll have to get some better secateurs, that are easier to squeeze.

Mrs M rang me last night… just to check on the dog. “She’s fine”, I said. And she is… albeit, suffering in this heat, as we all are.

She rang just as I was preparing my dinner. “So, what are you having?” she asked.

“Well, as it’s Sunday, I’ve decided to have a roast chicken dinner. I’ve got chicken, roast potatoes , peas, carrots, Yorkshire pudding and stuffing.””

“You? You’re cooking a roast?  I don’t believe you.”

“Nope, I am. I’m just preparing it all right now”, I said.

Pop!  Pop! Popopop!

“Hold on…is that the sound of a film lid being pierced?”

“It might be.”

I love being home alone.

Can you see what it is, yet?

From this picture, you can probably guess what I have been doing today.

We last painted the front of the house, about ten years ago and it has been looking rather shabby of late.

Mrs M also wanted to change the colour: grey is the new magnolia.

Apparently.

First coat was done this morning and a second coat tomorrow.  We have to get it done by midday, because that’s when the sun works it’s way round to the front and the temperature becomes unbearable to work in. And my aluminium ladders become unbearably hot to stand on, I discovered today.

I’ve really got a lot on, tomorrow, so I’ll probably have to start about 7am.

Michelangelo had it so much easier!

Jammy bastard

When I am at work. I will have porage as a mid morning snack – as I have mentioned here before.

But at home – as I am today – I’m quite keen on tea and toast.

With jam.

And – as everyone knows – the best jam to have on toast, is apricot.

You are all probably also aware that the best apricot jam in the world, is made by my sister-in-law.

Unfortunately, she has run out, but this pot of French apricot conserve, is actually a pretty good substitute.

Ri… ring, ri…ri…ring

This is our home telephone.

Well, one of a set of three.

Like most home phones, it’s of the cordless DECT variety.

And it’s knackered.

We seem to go through phones like they are going out of fashion. I reckon I have to replace them every couple of years or so.

We’ve had all the makes, but none of them seem to last.

“Panasonic is a good make”, “I thought. These should last OK”.

But no. The ringer is gone and we can hardly tell when it’s ringing sometimes.

I wouldn’t mind so much, but we rarely use them.

Maybe I’ll go back to the old corded versions. With a wire.

They never went wrong.

Well, hardly.

 

Wakey Wakey!

This is our alarm clock. It’s probably about 15 years old or more, but still going strong.

The good thing about it, is that it has two alarms: one for me and one for the current Mrs Masher.

The first alarm is mine and goes off at 5am, with a very annoying Beep Beep, Beep Beep… If I’m not awake before it goes off – which I usually am – then I tend to wake as soon as that first Beep Beep, goes off. No snoozing: straight up and out of bed.

Because I’m annoying like that.

The second alarm is for Mrs M. It’s the local radio station and it’s pretty loud. She will sleep through the first five minutes of it and then doze for another five before finally dragging herself out of bed.

Unbelievably though, I’ve known her to sleep right through it before now.

Wireless

Well, Summer seems to have arrived properly now, which means the grass needs to be cut far more regularly.

I hate gardening in general, so will only do the bare minimum to keep it looking tidy.

However, that bare minimum suddenly became a lot easier, last year, when I decided to get a petrol driven lawnmower. Not having to drag extension leads around the garden and not having to worry about accidentally running over the cord and cutting it (which I have done several times, in the past), makes the chore of mowing the lawn, that bit more agreeable.

In fact, so impressed was I with this (should have got one years ago), that I also went out and bought a cordless strimmer and a cordless hedge trimmer, both of which have proved to be a boon.

Now, if I can just find a cordless, dog-proof, garden broom…

Clean sweep

This is the broom that I use for sweeping up in the garden.

At least, it was until the dog got hold of it.

Ten years I have owned that broom.

Now look at it!

 

 

Typing it up

This month’s challenge is all about taking a daily photo of an everyday object and writing some mundane shit about it.

I think that, so far, I have excelled at this. Especially the second part.

But, I found myself sitting here at this desk this evening, wondering what everyday object I could photograph. What object do I use on a daily – or almost daily – basis?

And then I realised that this keyboard gets used several times a day. Easily.  Especially during Blogathons.

It has taken a right ol’ bashing, in it’s lifetime.

I have had it for many years and it’s absolutely filthy.

Tea – and other beverages – have all been spilt over it. Several times.

Biscuit crumbs and bits of muesli are stuck between – and under – some of the keys.

And the plastic lacquering is peeling off in places.

But, unlike me, it still works perfectly.

Clippety clip

I have had my haircut, this morning.

No visit to the barber for me, though. No, I let the current Mrs Masher do her usual hatchet job on it.  Fortunately, the ‘hatchet job’ is my preferred style.

In fact, I don’t think I have visited a barber’s shop since Mrs M and I first got together.

She’s not a trained hairstylist, or anything, but cutting hair is something that all women can do, I think.

To a degree.

Yes, on the odd occasion she has made a pig’s ear of it, but it’s never really bothered me.

Because it grows back.

All too quickly.

And nowadays, she pretty much has it off pat.

We have gone through many clippers over the years, but these are Mrs M’s currently preferred set.

They have lasted well and, after many uses, are still very sharp… as the blood currently running down from the tip of my left ear will testify.

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