Month: June 2018 (page 2 of 3)

Typing it up

This month’s challenge is all about taking a daily photo of an everyday object and writing some mundane shit about it.

I think that, so far, I have excelled at this. Especially the second part.

But, I found myself sitting here at this desk this evening, wondering what everyday object I could photograph. What object do I use on a daily – or almost daily – basis?

And then I realised that this keyboard gets used several times a day. Easily.  Especially during Blogathons.

It has taken a right ol’ bashing, in it’s lifetime.

I have had it for many years and it’s absolutely filthy.

Tea – and other beverages – have all been spilt over it. Several times.

Biscuit crumbs and bits of muesli are stuck between – and under – some of the keys.

And the plastic lacquering is peeling off in places.

But, unlike me, it still works perfectly.

Lost without it

This is my Swiss Army knife.

Well, one of them.

This is the larger of the two that I own.

The smaller one doesn’t have quite so many appendages, but it practically lives on my person. I carry it everywhere and it is always handy to have.  As it is always upon me though, I sometimes forget I have it… which is why it annoyingly got confiscated at Gatwick airport, a couple of years ago. Still, it made for a good gift the following Father’s Day.

Its bigger brother (featured above), lives on my desk and – again – is invaluable.

So much so, that a couple of years ago, I gave one to my Dad for Father’s Day, in the hope he would also find it as useful.

He did, and like me he carried it everywhere… which is why he had it confiscated at Heathrow Airport.

You can probably guess what he got for Father’s Day this year.

Breakfast like a king

I get up at 5am most days.

Breakfast tends to be around 5.10 and usually consists of Sainsbury’s Fruit & Fibre or Muesli.

That sees me through to mid-morning.

By 10am I am getting peckish again and so I have a box of porage sitting on my desk, just for that time.

As seen previously, we have plenty of milk.

And a microwave.

I’ll also slice a banana into it… just for fun. And some blueberries, if there are any kicking about.

Delicious.

 

Clippety clip

I have had my haircut, this morning.

No visit to the barber for me, though. No, I let the current Mrs Masher do her usual hatchet job on it.  Fortunately, the ‘hatchet job’ is my preferred style.

In fact, I don’t think I have visited a barber’s shop since Mrs M and I first got together.

She’s not a trained hairstylist, or anything, but cutting hair is something that all women can do, I think.

To a degree.

Yes, on the odd occasion she has made a pig’s ear of it, but it’s never really bothered me.

Because it grows back.

All too quickly.

And nowadays, she pretty much has it off pat.

We have gone through many clippers over the years, but these are Mrs M’s currently preferred set.

They have lasted well and, after many uses, are still very sharp… as the blood currently running down from the tip of my left ear will testify.

Vroom vroom

This is a picture of my bike, taken earlier today.

Just after we returned from the nail-biting ordeal that is the annual MOT.

I’m pleased to say that she passed with flying colours – although we did pick up an advisory warning for the tread on the front tyre being close to the mark.

Which it was, so I have asked them to order a nice new one.

I was a little bit apprehensive about the exhausts though, as I fitted new, louder ones a little while back.

Much louder.

I need not have worried: “She sounds nice” said the MOT inspector.

Indeed she does.

 

Take 2 bottles into the shower…?

The current Mrs Masher has a catering size bottle of Head & Shoulders that she and Amelia use for washing their hair.

Harry and I use a much smaller bottle – that lasts just as long.

Looking at them in the shower, this morning, I noticed that the one we boys use is emblazoned with the epithet: For Men.

Which is good.

Because we are.

But what is the difference between the two bottles, I wondered?

Well, checking through the list of unpronounceable chemicals on the back, the only difference I could see, was that the male version contains Limonene.

So, not only have I got soft and luxurious, dandruff-free hair, but it smells of lemons too.

Because I’m worth it.

Yuk.

Today, I have been to our head office in Reading.

For meetings, of course.

They don’t have teabags and a well stocked milk fridge there though.

Instead they have these tea & coffee machines.

Vended tea is the work of Satan and I avoid it at all costs.

Vended coffee isn’t much better… because they use powdered milk.

And so, black coffee becomes my alternate hot beverage.

To be fair, the coffee out of this machine is much better than others I’ve tasted.

But it’s still bloody horrible.

Watch this!

This is my wristwatch.

Well, it’s one of my wristwatches. I have three.

This is my day-to-day work watch. It’s solar powered, so doesn’t need winding.

I also have a weekend watch. Same make, but slightly more expensive, waterproof and powered by kinetic energy.

The third is my dress watch, the one I wear to weddings and funerals. It too is solar powered, waterproof and it is synced via radio to DSF77, the time signal broadcast from Germany.

I don’t wear jewelry of any kind… apart from a wristwatch… which I wear all the time (pun not intended, but unavoidable).

Without one, I feel naked.

You get what you pay for

This is the calculator that I use at work.  I took it out of my desk drawer specifically for this photo. And I wrote SHELLOIL on it, because it would have been infantile to have written BOOBS… and – contrary to popular opinion – I am a grown up.

I bought this calculator… actually, I didn’t – my parents bought me this calculator to do my college exams with.  I remember going into Dixon’s with my mum, and I remember her wincing at the price when I picked out the one that I wanted.

But, I’ve always been one to look after things and so this calculator – though it’s somewhere around 38 years old – still works perfectly. And it even still has the original instruction manual, tucked into its imitation leather, plastic wallet.

It got me through my electronics exams.

It got me through my Radio Amateur’s exam.

It even got me through the mathematical questions they suddenly threw at me, at my job interview for the GPO/British Telecom.

OK, yes, I’ve had to change the batteries and clean up the PCB, but on the whole, mum, I think I got your money’s worth.

Milky milky

I mentioned at the top of the month that I drink quite a lot of tea, at work.

I’m not the only one (although I have to mention that other hot beverages are available).

Of course, no-one in their right mind takes their tea black.

As such we have a fridge at work, in which to keep the milk.

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